Couples Therapy in Lehi

Is Conflict Driving A Wedge Between You And Your Partner?

Are you experiencing disconnection, a lack of intimacy, or difficulty navigating conflict in your relationship?
Has a recent change or stressor led to increased tension or an inability to communicate effectively?
Are you looking for guidance on how to move forward in a way that honors each other’s unique needs and values?

If you and your partner are caught up in a cycle of conflict or miscommunication, it makes sense that you’re feeling worried or even consumed by thoughts about your relationship. Everything from your work to your daily routine to your overall mental health may be impacted by tension in your partnership.

Frustrated by a lack of resolution, you might be feeling resentful, avoiding tough topics, or entering conversations with your defenses up. Over time, this may have affected your sex life or ability to have fun together. And maybe you’ve fantasized about someone else, another life, or acted on a betrayal.

Our therapists understand that you’re exhausted by the cycle, tired of hurting each other’s feelings. You want to learn to build trust and navigate issues with ease. Using proven counseling methods alongside a skills-based approach, you and your partner can repair your relationship as you improve your individual wellbeing.

couple in bright room with plants arguing

Do You Have Questions About Couples Therapy?

Healthy Attachment Is Not Innate, It’s Learned

Committed relationships require near-constant negotiation, which is what makes them hard work. Because our values are not always in alignment with our partners’, most of us will encounter conflict in our intimate relationships sooner or later.

Furthermore, there can be culturally specific factors that complicate a couple’s ability to navigate differences. For instance, LGBTQ+ couples face disproportionate discrimination, which can put undue stress on the relationship.

And in our area, in particular, couples of all backgrounds often experience religious tension in their relationship, which may take the form of incongruous value systems or feeling shunned by the community for certain lifestyle choices. In essence, external pressures can often make interpersonal dynamics worse.

Conflict Itself Is Not The Issue; It’s The Way Your Relationship Handles Conflict

Couples seek therapy for all kinds of reasons, but a common thread among many of our clients is not that they’re fighting—but that they’re not fighting well. Disagreement escalates quickly, and they’re having a hard time navigating differences or figuring out if their differences are even compatible in the first place.

If you and your partner are at this point in your relationship, know that you are not doomed. Like all of us, you just weren’t given training or some kind of guidebook for being an engaged, attuned partner—but these are skills you can learn in counseling. A couples therapist can offer you relationship-saving insights for escaping the cycle you’re stuck in.

couple smiling at each other and holding hands

Couples Therapy Through Willow Shore Counseling

Our therapy services are available to couples of all backgrounds and orientations, including LGBTQ+ couples, polyamorous/open relationships, and couples seeking premarital counseling. While we individualize the process to each couple’s unique experience and set of goals, some of the common issues our therapists treat are:

Obstacles to effective communication and boundary-setting
Conflict around parenting, finances, in-laws, and/or the division of labor
Betrayal trauma
Mixed-faith and culturally-based differences
Desire discrepancy or sexual concerns
Questions around ethical nonmonogamy or opening up your marriage/relationship

We want to help you figure out where the relationship shares common ground—and where each of you needs to work on bridging the gap. As we teach you skills for listening, communicating, validating, and repairing, you and your partner can learn how to honor one another, even when you disagree.

Our Approach

Couples therapists are trained in systems, which means a significant aspect of our work in therapy revolves around identifying and understanding patterns. Once we learn more about which relationship patterns are not helpful, we can begin changing the dynamic and working through the conflict instead of just repeating it.

In order to do this, we integrate two time-tested, couples-specific approaches into counseling: Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) and The Gottman Method. Both of these methods are designed to help you deepen and repair attachments, offering skills that can be applied both in and out of the therapy space. We may also incorporate values-based work—particularly if you are navigating mixed-faith/cultural differences or opening up the marriage/relationship—using Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT).

The commitment you made to your significant other is no doubt genuine and meaningful, but love alone doesn’t always repair a relationship. The deep, attachment-focused work you do in couples therapy can help reignite your connection, solve problems more quickly, and allow you to stay close even when disagreement occurs. Conflict is inevitable in relationships, but couples counseling can help you learn to fight better.

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Common Concerns About Couples Therapy

It’s sometimes difficult to convince a partner to join the therapy process—many people are afraid to look like the “bad guy,” or they’re ashamed they can’t handle issues on their own. But our role as couples therapists is to help all of our clients feel understood and develop self-compassion in the often tricky process of healing relationship conflict.
This work requires accountability from both partners, and remember that our therapists are humans too! We know that navigating relationships isn’t easy, and that there is no “perfect” way of finding solutions.
We’re sorry to hear that you didn’t get what you wanted out of therapy in the past; couples work is tricky, and not all therapists do it effectively. It makes sense if you’ve been left with a bad taste in your mouth after a negative experience.
This process is most successful when it’s done consistently and guided by a therapist who’s well-versed in relational work. Our team has a lot of experience working with couples, and we encourage you to learn more about your therapist’s unique training and approach during your consultation call.
While it’s hard to predict how long counseling will take, we find that couples make great strides when they commit to weekly sessions and practicing skills both in and outside of the therapy space. Most couples begin to see sustained change within six months of counseling, though therapy can take longer with more acute cases.

Heal Your Connection

If you and your partner are struggling to navigate conflict or have tough conversations, couples therapy through Willow Shore Counseling can be the first step towards a more vulnerable, open, and connected relationship. For more information, contact us or schedule a free consultation with one of our experienced couples therapists.

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